Tuesday, January 12, 2010

No Guarantee

My monkeys, how I do love my monkeys. They are both in "school" now. Carly in real school and Anna in daycare. They are both doing well. Anna thinks she has to have homework when Carly does so we give her paper and crayons and let her do her thing. I am certain when the homework really comes along she will not be quite so interested in doing it. I am amazed at how well Anna has adjusted and is doing in daycare. Her speech is better with each passing today and I am finally really able to take a deep breath: 1. because she is talking and going to be verbal and 2. because I don't have to learn sign language. I was terrified of how and if I would ever be able to learn it. I wouldn't mind knowing a second language but to think about having to know it and use it to ever be able to communicate with your child is a whole different beast. When I picked her up today she said, "CawYee ungo ohm!" (Carly. Want to go home.) She is so in love with Carly. Carly is the first thing she asks for when she wakes up and the last person she wants to see before she closes her eyes at night. I pray that the bond between the two of them is always this strong. Carly is having a hard time right now at night. She is afraid someone is going to come into our house and kidnap her at night (yes, I know, high anxiety). We have added "...and keep Carly safe" during her nightly prayers and as soon as we finish her prayers she takes a deep sigh of relief and says, "I can sleep now." I hope and pray that she will always have faith like a child and that she will always firmly believe as much as she does today that the Lord will protect her and hear her cries and answer her prayers. As I sat in Mrs. Bezner's funeral today I really started thinking about just how precious life is and how suddenly it can slip away. I also have a second cousin who will be buried tomorrow. She was only 54 and was fine one day and on a ventilator and then dead within 3 days. This earthly life is not guaranteed. We are not guaranteed another second, much less another day. All I know is that each time I am faced with a death I just want to hold my kids a little tighter and hug my husband a little longer...
Oh, and just so you know that God has a nice sense of humor... I wrote the last post and then went to work the next day and had...drum roll please...yes, another drug overdose.

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